The True Cost of Fatness

First, a big thank you to my reluctant food models, Golda, Chris, and Kristine; all three of whom fall far outside the range of fatness.

As promised here are the pictures of all the food we ate at the Orange County Fair. At the time i was just going to post all these pictures on my flikr site, but after seeing item after item of i knew commentary was inevitable.

Fresh Frozen Lemonade

How fitting we started with the healthiest item of the evening. Luckily we missed the week of 100+ degrees, but it was still relatively warm when we arrived. I didn't have a frozen lemonade with them, but the next time we passed the booth i did try freshly squeezed lemonade---yummy! I hate to ruin the anticipation for all the other items to follow, but i have to admit, the lemonade was my favorite item of the night.

BBQ Turkey Leg

We were already hungry by the time we got there so we were looking for food as soon as we walked through the gates---i'm sure that's how everyone comes to the fair, ready to eat. We walked by many booths and stands, but as soon as Chris and Golda commented they had never had a Disneyland turkey leg despite always wanting to try one---we knew what we were having for dinner. They shared one. What you don't see is me eating an entire one by myself. I have to admit it was pretty good, but dryer than the ones at Disneyland.

Fresh Hot Cinnamon Bun with Frosting

After dinner we walked around for a bit and eventually wound up next to, you guessed it, more food. Inside one of the exhibition halls, where they sell items that, "slice, dice, and also make Julian fries!", we found beef jerky, lots of candy, and even pickled things, but at the very end of the hall was the very popular fresh cinnamon buns. I had a bun without the frosting and it was perfect, not too sweet and not too plain---it was just right. Golda and Chris, as you can see, were enjoying the evening with the "what the heck, it's only once a year" attitude.

Pepperoni Pizza

Towards the end of the night Chris disappeared for a couple of minutes and then reappeared with a slice of pepperoni pizza! I have no idea where he got it, but it did look pretty good.

At the same time i went to look for ice cream of some type, but amazingly enough all i could find were ice cream bars and snow cones. I imagine a stand selling ice cream with fresh waffle cones would make a killing at a fair (cones were supposedly invented at a World's Fair), but there was none to be found---it made me sad. For those of you aspiring to open a stand at the OC Fair, take note! You can set up next to my Yang's Chinese Palm Reading and i'll be your first customer next year. And from the popularity of the food yet to come, i definitely won't be the only one.

Up until this point you're probably thinking, "this doesn't look all that bad, what is this fatness Seth is talking about?" Well that's because i've been saving the worst for last. I present to you:

Deep Fried

These first items were what Kristine's friends had ordered for dinner---fish & chips and deep fried sweet potatoes. I'm sure the fish & chips were good, although Mary says fish & chips anywhere outside the UK are a joke. The sweet potatoes were very tasty. I didn't try them this year, but i remember ordering them and enjoying them last year. They remind me of the sweet potatoes you can order at the small deep fried stands in Taiwan, minus the spicy seasoning. I wonder how well one of those stands would do here at a fair in the US. I'm sure the chicken hearts and pig's blood would be a big hit. I never did get a pictures of Kristine's BBQ chicken sandwich, but don't worry, it wasn't anything out of the ordinary. What was a little out of the ordinary was what Kristine ordered when Chris went to find his pizza. I think it's deep fried eggplant but I'm not really all that sure. Lets just say if you wanted anything deep fried, then it was available for you.

"Now Seth, do you really mean anything?" Yes, i really mean anything.
What's coming up below is outside the bounds of reality for the non-fatties and the health-conscious. I must warn you, your cholesterol and your risk for heart disease will increase just by looking at this food.

Deep fried Twinkies. Yes, i was in disbelief so i took a picture to document the truth of it. This is what i was thinking when i saw the sign above, "Y'know, i don't think deep frying a Twinkie has enough flavor, lets go ahead and smother them in chocolate or raspberry syrup." And in case you were wondering, yes the fair had electric wheelchairs (the same models available at Disneyland!) available to rent for those who have no self control---talk about a service that was making good money. What's not pictured here is an assortment of other deep fried junk food, like deep fried Snickers. We did order the deep fried Oreos. According to everyone else they're pretty good as long as they're warm. I didn't try one despite the chants of "everyone's doing it" and "you'll be popular!" I just couldn't bring myself to eat fat deep fried in fat.

And now for the finale. Again, i must warn the faint of heart to proceed with caution. Just looking and thinking about this next item makes me sick. I present to you the piece de resistance:

Deep Fried Krispy Kreme Glazed Doughnut Chicken Sandwich

I am at a loss for words.

The moral of the story is: who really pays for this gluttony? We do. If you don't believe me, then follow the link embedded in the title. Keep in mind the USA Today article was posted in May of 2003---just imagine how much worse off we are today.